Translating Hebrew
A team of archaeologists were excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols, in this order of appearance: A woman, a donkey, a shovel, a fish, and a Star of David. They decided that this was a unique find and the writings were […]
And God Made Man
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve called out to God…”Lord, I have a problem!”
“What’s the problem, Eve?”
“Lord, I know you’ve created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedic snake, but I’m just not happy.”
“Why is that, Eve?” came the reply from above.
“Lord, I […]
Unheavenly Blessed
Three nuns were talking. The first nun said “I was cleaning the Fathers room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic magazines”
“What did you do?” the other nuns asked.
“Well, of course I threw them in the trash”
The second nun said, ” Well, I can top that. I was […]
Paradise
There were two lovers, who were really into spiritualism and reincarnation. They vowed that if either died, the one remaining would try to contact the partner in the other world exactly 30 days after their death. Unfortunately, a few weeks later, the young man died in a car wreck. True to her word, his sweetheart […]
Say Your Prayers
One night, a father overheard his son saying his prayers, “God bless Mommy, Daddy, and Grammy. Goodbye Grampa.” The father thought this was strange, but soon forgot about it. The next day, the Grandfather died. About a month or so later, the father again overheard his son’s prayers, “God bless Mommy and Daddy. Goodbye Grammy.” […]
Eleventh Commandment
Last week a very important meeting took place among God, the Pope and Moses. They were troubled because the President of the United States was behaving in an inappropriate manner and there were many people who saw nothing wrong in what he had done. They decided that the only course of action left was to […]
Preacher’s Horse Racing Exploits
A preacher wanted to raise money for his church and on being told that there was a fortune in horse racing, decided to purchase one and enter it in the races.
However at the local auction, the going price for horses was so high that he ended up buying a donkey instead. He figured that since […]
How Man Earned Longevity
God created the donkey and told him: you will work tireless from sun up to sun down, carrying heavy bags on your back, you’ll eat grass, you will not have intelligence and you will live 50 years. You will be a DONKEY!
The donkey answered: I’ll be a donkey, but living 50 years is too much, […]
The Cost Of Woman
One day, after a near eternity in the Garden of Eden, Adam calls out to God, “Lord, I have a problem.”
“What’s the problem, Adam?” God replies.
“Lord, I know you created me and have provided for me and surrounded me with this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, but I’m just not happy.”
“Why is […]
God’s Time And Money
A preacher went into his church and he was praying to God. While he was praying, he asked God, “How long is 10 million years to you?”
He replied, “1 second.”
The next day the preacher asked God, “God, how much is 10 million dollars to you?”
And God replied, “A penny.”
Then finally the next day the preacher […]
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