You Might be Addicted to AOL if
* Tech Support calls “You” for help.* Someone at work tells you a joke and you say LOL.* You watch TV with the closed captioning turned on.* You have called out someone’s screen name while making love to your significant other.* You keep begging your friends to get an account “so we can hang out.”* […]
Apple Computers
Apple had a new computer under development. Their project name for it was “Carl Sagan” (I don’t know why).
When the real Carl Sagan learned about this, he was upset. He demanded that Apple stop using his name, even for their private, internal projects.
Apple agreed. They changed the name of the project to “Butthead Astronomer”.
Share […]
AOL Pie
A long, long, time agoI can still remember when I dialed up their help desk lines.And I knew if I had the chanceThey could make my modem dancewith chats and GIFs and silly pick-up lines.But Help Desk phone calls made me shiverwith every busy they’d deliver.Bad news on the front pageA 19-hour outrage.I can’t remember […]
Accident
There was an engineer, manager and programmer driving down a steep mountain road.
The brakes failed and the car careened down the road out of control.
Half way down the driver managed to stop the car by running it against the embankment narrowing avoiding going over a cliff.
They all got out, shaken by their narrow escape from […]
An artist, a lawyer, and a computer scientist
An artist, a lawyer, and a computer scientist are discussing the merits of a mistress. The artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with the risk of being discovered. The lawyer warns of the difficulties. It can lead to guilt, divorce, bankruptcy. Not worth it. Too many problems. The computer scientist says “It’s […]
A Guide to Modern Operating Systems
UnixYou shoot yourself in the foot.
DOSYou keep running up against the one-bullet barrier.
MS-WindowsThe gun blows up in your hand.
Windows NTThe gun is so huge and unwieldy that you have to keep swapping it from one hand to the other.
OS/2The gun and the bullet aren’t speaking to each other any more.
Mac FinderIt’s easy to shoot yourself […]
2 Programmers on a Highway
Two computer programmers are driving on a Highway. They switch on the radio and there is a warning: Please note that a car is driving on highway 75 against the traffic. The programmer near the driver looks at him and says: One? There are hundreds of them.
Share This
Abort, Retry, Ignore?
Once upon a midnight dreary, fingers cramped and vision bleary, System manuals piled high and wasted paper on the floor, Longing for the warmth of bed sheets, still I sat there doing spreadsheets. Having reached the bottom line I took a floppy from the drawer, I then invoked the SAVE command and waited for the […]
Nerd Season
A truck driver, hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers, stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar, he sees a big sign on the door that says, “COMPUTER NERDS NOT ALLOWED - ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!” He enters and sits down.
The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, and says that he smells kind […]
You Might Be A Redneck Jedi Knight If…
You ever uttered the phrase, “May the force be with y’all.”
Your Jedi robe is camouflage.
You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.
You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Boone’s Farm Strawberry Hill.
At least one wing of your X-wing is primer colored.
You have bantha horns on the front of […]
-
Search
-
Subscribe
Archives
- December 2007
- November 2007
- October 2007
- July 2007
- June 2007
- January 2007
- November 2006
- October 2006
- September 2006
- August 2006
- July 2006
- June 2006
- May 2006
- April 2006
- March 2006
- February 2006
- January 2006
- December 2005
- November 2005
- October 2005
- September 2005
- August 2005
- July 2005
- June 2005
- May 2005
- April 2005
- March 2005
- February 2005
- January 2005
- December 2004
-
Home Security Monitoring
Prepaid Phone Cards On Sale
Kittens For Sale
Easy Crock Pot Recipes
Choteau Montana
