Blonde One Liners Continued

Q: Why did the blonde have square boobs?
A: She forgot to take the tissue out of the box.

Q: Whats an intelligent blonde?
A: A Golden Retreiver.

Q: What did they call the blonde that was found dead in the closet?
A: The 1994 Hide and Go Seek Champion.

Q: Why was the Blonde’s brain the size of a pea after exercising?
A: It swelled up!

Q: How can you tell when a blonde has been baking chocolate chip cookies?
A: There’s M&M Shells all over the floor.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who died drinking milk?
A: The cow fell on her.

Q: What do blondes and beer bottles have in common?
A: They are both empty from the neck up!

Q: Why does a blonde keep a wire coat hanger in the back seat of her car?
A: In case she locks her keys in.

Q: Did you hear how the Blonde Hockey Team drowned?
A: Spring Training.

Q: What do you call a blonde in a business suit, sitting on a tree, holding a briefcase?
A: A branch manager

Q: Why did the blonde snort Sweet-n-Low?
A: She thought it was Diet Coke.

Q: What does a blonde say after two more years of college?
A: Would you like fries with that?

Q: Why did the blonde cross the road?
A: I dont know, and neither does she.

Q: Why has the wave been outlawed at baseball games?
A: Because all the blondes used to drown.

Q: What was the last thing a blonde heard before dying of old age?
A: “Today children, we will learn our ABC’s…”

Q: What do you call a blonde with a leather jacket?
A: A rebel without a clue.

Q: What do you get when you cross a blonde with a postal worker?
A: A fluezy with an Uzi.

Q: Why did the Blond wear high-heel shoes?
A: She was once told by her mother to never sell herself short.

Q: What goes stop, go, stop, go, stop, go?
A: A blonde at a flashing red light.

Q: What do you call five blondes laying on a beach
A: A public access.

Q: What is a blonde’s mating call?
A: I’m SO DRUNK!

Q: What happened to the Blonde Tap Dancer?
A: She fell in the sink.

Q: What’s the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot?
A: Maybe someday, we’ll find bigfoot.

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: Put her in a round room, and tell her to sit in a corner.

Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley?
A: Supermarket trolleys have a mind of their own.

Q: What did the blond say when her boyfriend blew in her ear?
A: Thanks for the refill, honey.

Q: Why don’t blondes ever eat pickles?
A: Because they can’t ever get their heads out the jar!

Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear with a hose at the end?
A: An air compressor.

Q: What do you call a line of blondes standing ear to ear.
A: A wind tunnel.

Q: Why do blondes leave empty milk cartons in the fridge?
A: In case someone wants black coffee.

Q: Why are blonde jokes so stupid?
A: So brunettes can get them!

Q: What does a blonde say after she knocks over an antique vase that is priceless and it cracks on the ground?
A: “It’s Okay daddy, I’m alright”
 
Q: What do blondes and cow patties have in common?
A: The older they get the easier they are to pick up.

Q: What would a blonde say if you asked her what the score was?
A: 24 to 28, tie.

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January 18, 2006 | Filed Under Blonde Jokes 

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